Work For Your Marriage

Marriage is hard work. There are more people now putting in hard work even before their marriage journey starts by investing their time attending marriage preparation programmes. Marriage preparation programmes (MPP) essentially help couples to orientate themselves to their spouses’ worldviews and understand their possible different perspectives on a range of issues like financial management, child rearing through the help of a third party, usually a trained professional.  Such programmes are gaining popularity in recent years and EMCC’s MPP has likewise seen a growing demand. In the latest edition of Real Love Works magazine, there was a comprehensive feature written on the many benefits of MPP. Click on the Oct-Dec issue here to read what  past participants of EMCC’s “Beyond I do” have to say about how has MPP helped their marriage.

Workshops Bonaza

The last quarter of 2011 was an exciting one,  filled with opportunities to share our expertise. Through a series of training workshops and talks, we connected with a diverse group of individuals ranging from students to professionals.

EMCC held workshops for different groups of professionals on conflict management, focusing on mediation as an effective means of conflict resolution. Professionals from the education field, namely the allied health educators from schools in the North Zone cluster and teachers from Tampines Secondary, had their first taste of mediation under the guidance of EMCC’s expert mediator trainers. The workshops were held on 6 Oct and 2 & 3 Nov respectively. EMCC also concluded its third run of the “Basic Mediation Advocacy” workshops for working professionals for the year on 15 & 16 Nov.

Holding true to its cause of promoting the spirit of peacemaking in schools, EMCC conducted peer mediation workshops for Greendale Secondary on 9 & 10 Nov and Singapore Chinese Girls’ School on 24 & 25 Nov respectively. The students were taught foundational mediation skills to resolve interpersonal conflict within the school context and had opportunities to put the skills they learnt to test in fictional dispute scenarios.

Recognising that peace begins with the family, EMCC also worked closely with couples and parents to equip them with basic mediation skills within the family context. Collaborating with Marriage Central, husband-wife team comprising EMCC’s Principal Mediator Chia Swee Tin and EMCC Management Committee member Chia Kok Leong gave an inspiring talk titled “Fight to Love / Love to Fight” to couples on conflict management. Held on 19 Nov, the engaging couple shared with more than 50 couples on how they learn to normalise fights in their marriage journey of 40 years.

EMCC also brought its own brand of peacemaking to North Spring Primary School on 10 Nov where thirty-one parents had a first-hand account from EMCC’s Executive Director Benjamin Chan on parent-child conflict. Benjamin spoke extensively on the importance of connecting emotionally and establishing a strong bond between parent and child.

We hope that our training workshops will serve as a springboard from which a future cohort of mediation advocates can be nurtured, contributing to the peacemaking cause in the community.

We value your partnership!

Thank you for journeying alongside us in 2010 as well as through the difficult years of 2008/09. The move to our new office location at Liang Court has provided us with an enhanced capacity to better serve the community with more counselling rooms as well as a training centre. Launching out in 2011, we are optimistic of reaching more lives and families but are ever mindful that financially we will also be stretched. However, we are grateful that we have you to partner us and that your concern in bringing hope, reconciliation and healing to broken and hurting relationships that are ever present around us, will see us through 2011 and in the years ahead.

We look forward to your continued support and to receiving your increasing favour and goodwill towards forging a closer partnership with you to overcome the challenges ahead. We encourage you to try donating online through our website at www.emcc.org.sg/Donations_Default.aspx.

Wishing you and all your relationships a blessed and meaningful 2011!

Celebrating Wholesome Individuals

From 8-10 November 2010, our staff, associates and trainers were introduced to the “Skills For Living” Program by the Aphesis Group Therapy developer Tim Rule and his renown consultant, David Eckman. The curricular of this program is to train mental health workers, counselors, educators to know how to engage with adults and youths to:

• Understand their makeup and their development.
• Identify traits of miscommunication and behavioral patterns that were results of family background.
• Create awareness on areas of their lives where there is need of development.
• Learn skills and exercises that help to develop areas of emotional and relational health.
• Set developmental framework and plans for personal development

The eight modular curriculum of the Program is to address various emotional, communication and developmental needs. The way the curriculum is designed is coupled with interactive activities and motivational interviews to help participants to gain self awareness and understanding of personal needs for growth. It is done in group setting whereby symptoms and dysfunctional styles are shared in the process of discovery and activity. It provides good interaction and a safe environment for self and communal learning. There are careful researches done drawing statistical reports on behavioral science. Issues on addiction, communication dysfunctional styles and emotional difficulties are addressed.

While this project is still at the infant stage, the training given to our counselors has exposed them to an added level of skills and knowledge to better understand and guide their counselees to recovery.

Celebrating Healthy Kids

As reflected in the current investigation on increased gang fights involving youths, the dire lack of good parenting in Singapore has again come to the fore. The fallout in terms of unhealthy or “at-risk’ kids cannot be underestimated. EMCC has been working with the schools under the MCYS Enhanced Step-Up Programme (originally called the Step-Up Programme) for the last 3 years.  It involves field workshops and counselling sessions (including home counselling with the parents). We believe healthy kids is a by-product of good familial relationships especially the one with the father.

Again, under the North East CDC Family and Fathering initiatives we have help arranged various father-child bonding activities and workshops which we believe would help produce a conducive environment for growing healthy kids. This is what one child has to say “I have learnt to communicate with my father” and another “I want to thank daddy for spending time with me”. And who would not agree that communication and spending time are two important ingredients necessary for cultivating healthy bonding and relationships.

Celebrating Family and Fathering

In our pursuit of relational excellence, EMCC recognises the importance of fatherhood in the social development of every child and it is indeed one of the most profound and rewarding role in a man’s life and we are glad to have helped budding fathers prepare and equip themselves as they embark on this life-changing adventure together with their significant other half.

In this connection with and in support of the new fathering movement in Singapore, EMCC launched a series of Active Fathering Workshops with the objective of equipping fathers to be the role model and pacesetters of their family. One such workshops was a fatherhood preparation workshop entitled “Dare 2b a Dad-2b” for new and expectant dads designed to explore the transition of the husband into the role of the father – bringing to light and awareness the various changes involved, as well as how to plan for and manage them. Another in-house workshop conducted by EMCC was “The Legacy Dad” which challenged fathers to leave a lasting and meaningful legacy for their children apart from material wealth. Wives of these dads were also invited to these fathering workshops to provide their husbands with the understanding and support in their parenting adventure together.